How to Fight for your Marriage When Separated

Separation in a relationship refers to taking a break, which could result in reconciliation or a complete breakup. It indicates that you and your partner aren’t currently having a romantic or physical relationship.

You’re taking time to reflect on your relationship and sort out your issues.
You are searching for a way to remove yourself from the situation you are in because you, your partner, or both of you cannot commit fully to the current state of your relationship.

The decision to separate is complex. Living apart from someone makes you physically sick when you’ve been with someone for a while.

That is where you adopt the question of how to fight for your marriage when separated.

How to Fight for your Marriage when Separated? 17 ways to Save your Relationship

Commitment from both partners is necessary for a healthy and happy marriage. Numerous typical situations can result in marital problems, separation, and in some cases, divorce; however, even if you and your partner have grown apart, there are ways to resolve conflict and disagreements.

A successful outcome is possible if both parties work toward reconciliation.

This article will discuss 17 ways to save your relationship when separated. Most of these ways include:

1. Don’t Wait

If you believe there are problems in your marriage, it’s crucial to start immediately.

Waiting until managing everything becomes impossible because the relationship is causing stress differs from what you want to do.
Putting off dealing with issues as they arise causes many pent-up emotions, which can be exhausting for everyone involved.

When you wait for too long, during separation, the feelings start to fade and wane. So it is proper if you still find the marriage please to try and sort out its problems.

2. Identify the Problem

Discussing problems with others and developing objectives for reducing problems once they are identified is critical.

Even though it’s common for one person’s problem not to affect the other’s, it’s crucial to take your partner’s problems into account because they affect your relationship as a whole.

To create a road-map outlining how to avoid these potholes, come together as partners, identify the obstacles, and list them.

3. Talk About a Conflict of Interest With Kindness

Use kindness when approaching or discussing conflict, and learn to fight pretty when you have differences of opinion if you love someone and want to make your relationship work.

Most of the time, the issue is more related to the context, meaning, and manner in which it was raised.

Our partners may have unrecognized wounds that can be easily reopened by how we say things.

A simple statement can easily make the other person feel attacked, criticized, denigrated, and unloved. Consider the example given above.

4. Be Committed to your Wants

The objective you’ve set for yourself, and your marriage shouldn’t be budged in the slightest. It would not be easy to continue when you are the only torchbearer for saving a marriage during separation.

Therefore, in this situation, you must be steadfast in your goals for your marriage.

Even though you may start to wonder why you’re doing it, your partner will likely show little or no interest.
Maintaining your chosen course of action is necessary.

5. Set Boundaries

You might feel exposed when you’re working alone to keep your marriage together while separated. Instead of making the issue worse, you must establish some boundaries that will aid in your ability to resolve it.

Talk about how and what you would communicate and deal with any sexual issues and other issues that might impact your marriage.

You should discuss these issues with each other to help each other understand what might happen if you decide to go ahead with your choice.

Either the spouse will relent, or you’ll be ready for the worst-case scenario.

6. Sort out the Problems

It is possible that the root of your separation is not something that seems to be hovering on the surface. Real issues need to be dug up when you are determined to save your marriage on your own during the break.

It is advised to find the primary issue and address it rather than focusing on trivial issues. You have to do it even if you find it difficult.

Consider the reasons for the rift between the two of you. If necessary, seek guidance to solve the issue.

You will only notice that things are returning to normal after you address the problems.

7. Take Responsibilities

Take your time with your partner bringing up a topic if you feel the need to bring it up yourself. Since you share responsibility for the relationship’s success with your partner, you must speak up and take the initiative yourself.

By doing so, you’ll give your partner more confidence to bring up issues that they’d like to address as well. It is also true that you should refrain from holding your partner responsible for past events.

However, it would be best if you also made an effort to look back and recognize what went wrong on your end.

You must realize that you and your partner contributed to the situation in some measure. Therefore, the moment you accept responsibility, things may start to change for the better.

8. Apologize

You will almost certainly need to apologize if you are in a relationship. Although making amends can be terrifying, it is crucial for restoring lost trust and mending a tense relationship.

It is one thing to apologize for doing a particular wrong, take responsibility for the action, and vow not to repeat it.

Apologies go a long way to help mend old injuries that may have resulted in separation.

9. Forgive and be Forgiven

Forgiveness is crucial if you want to rebuild a relationship after a betrayal. You might also need to forgive yourself in addition to your partner.

If you hold yourself accountable for what happened, you might continue to be bogged down in self-doubt. It might be more challenging to repair your relationship as a result.

Depending on how your partner betrayed you, it might not be easy to forgive them and move on. But remember that extending forgiveness to your partner does not imply that you agree with what they did.

Instead, you’re empowering yourself to accept what happened and move past it. Furthermore, you’re giving your partner a chance to develop and gain knowledge from their mistakes.

10. Work on your Flaws

Never think of yourself as perfect if you want to maintain your marriage despite your separation. Because you are a human being, you will inevitably make mistakes.

Spend some time acknowledging your errors before improving yourself and, ultimately, your relationship. The act of acceptance will take a long time.

It will initially be challenging to pinpoint the problem that’s bothering you. However, once you’ve done it, start working toward it to improve things.

11. Communicate

Any successful relationship is built on communication. Words have a lot of power, and being cruel or mean can cause harm, which may take months to recover fully.

When you and your partner are calm, you can listen to each other more effectively than you can react.

Making sure what you have to say lands safely depends significantly on knowing your communication’s goal.

12. Reach Out

Take some real space after you both feel finished making amends to one another. This kind of time away causes you to wonder, “What are they up to? Do they have me in mind? I’m considering them, and I want to make contact. 

Trust your instincts and intuitions when determining the appropriate duration; decide as a group. This could take a week or ten days.

It should be long enough to be uncomfortable but not so long that you are genuinely “separate.” 

After this time, resume courtship slowly. Show interest in one another’s lives and engage in things that made you fall in love in the first place.

13. Share Feelings

Because one or both partners need to be more honest, the relationship frequently has difficulties. This causes uncertainty and suspicion, which could cause the connection to worsen.

Make sure you are honest with your partner if you must save your marriage on your own during a separation.

Keeping true to your feelings will help you get over the issue and eliminate any chances that could end your relationship.

13. Appreciate your Partner

A little gratitude goes a long way. Your partner can know you care about them with a simple thank you, a small gift, or a gesture.

Understanding each other’s love languages is crucial because, even though you may believe you know how your partner prefers to be appreciated, you may be mistaken.

It is crucial to discuss what they require to feel valued to determine the best course of action for meeting that need.

14. Think Positive

The only option is to maintain hope while separated, but you should also think positively about the world around you.

Passing the challenging times becomes simple when we maintain a positive attitude and reason.

While it might be challenging initially if you can maintain a positive attitude throughout the day and every hour, things will gradually improve.

15. Respect your Partner

You’ll find yourself surrounded by a lot of resentment, blame, and possibly even guilt when trying to save your marriage on your own during separation.

You might begin to lose respect for your partner, which is unacceptable.

You need to develop respect for your partner.
To maintain love and respect for your partner, you must cling to everything good about them.

You must not allow this respect to declining under any circumstances; otherwise, your entire effort to preserve your marriage while separated will be for naught.

Everyone experiences difficult times, but that doesn’t mean you should try to end your relationship with your partner.

16. Don’t Assume

Moving forward requires clarity, particularly when attempting to mend a broken relationship.

Assuming is merely an elevated form of worrying, which takes away our partner’s influence and speaking ability, which can breed mistrust.

Our presumptions frequently result from insecurities or a fear of having a difficult conversation. It’s critical to realize that thoughts can cause people to feel misunderstood.

Even if you believe the questions are silly, take the time to ask them rather than make assumptions.

17. Seek advice from a Marriage Counselor

It can be challenging to share your most private needs with a stranger, but don’t be afraid to ask for assistance; it might be the difference between your marriage failing and succeeding.

A couples therapist can assist you in figuring out what works for your particular union and offer the right direction for a happy and fruitful relationship.


There are many things you can do to keep your marriage intact. Even though the exit door may appear the most straightforward option, if you both choose to work towards reconciliation, it is never too late to have a fulfilling relationship.

If you ever find yourself in this situation and want to save your marriage, follow the advice above to strengthen your marriage while you’re apart.
These guidelines will help you maintain your composure and dignity while preventing disaster in your marriage.



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