My Wife Belittles Me – 15 Things To Do Immediately

Belittling entails actions that make your spouse feel unimportant, dismissed, minor, and inferior to you.

It includes making jokes at the other person’s expense, using humor or sarcasm to mask hurtful remarks, correcting your spouse in public, continually discussing issues they feel insecure about, excluding the other person from major decision-making, etc.

In marriage, either partner can be guilty of this offense. Whether it is intentional or not, belittling someone you swore to love for the rest of your days can mess with their self-esteem and chip away at the very essence of their being.

It is a form of abuse and manipulative behavior that can spell doom for the marriage.

My Wife Belittles Me – 15 Things To Do

When the husband is the victim, belittling affects his ego negatively, mainly because men love to be respected and held in high esteem by their wives.

It also puts him in a challenging position because he may have difficulties talking to someone about it or fear mockery from other men who believe the man should control the marriage.

If your wife belittles you, here are some things you can do to stop it and hopefully save your marriage. They Include:

1. Be In Position To Provide

Few things frustrate a wife, like a husband who cannot or doesn’t want to provide. The provision does not have to include fancy vacations on private islands or dresses from her favorite designer. At the very least, meet the basic needs. Pay the bills on time.

Be In Position To Provide

Think about this; the Christian bible describes a man who cannot provide as worse than an infidel.

What about your wife, who is just flesh and blood? Sometimes, you may not be able to provide for various reasons. In this case, you can upskill, get another job or contribute to the home in other ways.

The bottom line here is to take away the reason underlying this behavior. This should come into your mind any time you have thoughts like  my wife belittles me.

2. Set Boundaries

A clear line should define what is acceptable or unacceptable to you in your marriage. This “line” should not just exist in your head. Make it known in words and actions to your wife.

She should be aware that you do not appreciate being belittled and that there will be consequences whenever she does that.

Asides from setting boundaries, you should enforce them. If your wife notices that you are all talk and no bite, she will be less inclined to step away from that toxic behavior. This should come into your mind any time you have thoughts like  my wife belittles me

3. Try To Communicate

Have you ever considered that your wife may not know how you feel? Feeling belittled is subjective, and since your wife is not a mind reader, she may not know that her actions are hurtful.

You can inform her by citing an instance of what she said and how it made you feel. This way, she will gradually learn what words and language to use while speaking to you.

Belittling is about more than just what was said and how it was said. Remember to include that bit of information while airing your grievances. This should come into your mind any time you have thoughts like  my wife belittles me

4. Have A High Sense Of Humor

It is a good thing when people have a taste of their own medicine. If your wife is using sarcasm and humor to mask distasteful remarks, it may be high time you started doing the same thing.

When she jokes about the size of your stomach, respond with a corresponding joke about her stomach or another part she is insecure about. Whatever response you come up with should match hers.

Try not to go above the board. You want to remedy the situation, not worsen it. Over time, it will become clear that if she does not want to feel a certain way, she should not make you feel that way. Anytime you think “my wife belittles me.” be ready to apply this.

5. Take A Break

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. If things feel out of control, you may need to stay away from your wife for a while.

This allows you to evaluate your choices and what marriage means to both of you—besides, over-familiarity breeds contempt. A break will enable you to clear your head. Sometimes your wife needs to feel your absence to appreciate your value.

She should taste how it will feel to lose you if her abusive behavior ruins your marriage. That could be all the motivation she needs to change. Anytime you think “my wife belittles me.” be ready to use this method.

6. Try Therapy

Your wife may be subconsciously repeating toxic patterns from her childhood. If your wife grew up in an environment where people belittle one another, she may have picked up that habit as a child and carried it into marriage.

Try Therapy

While you may feel hurt by her actions, she may just wonder why you are sensitive and view your concerns as trivial since they are normal to her.

In this case, you need to convince her to start therapy because she is damaged, affecting how she interacts with you. Anytime you think “my wife belittles me.” be ready to apply this.

7. Spend Time With Others

Belittling is an example of verbal abuse. Like other forms of abuse, its effects are more potent when isolated. You should spend time with friends and relatives who validate you.

If she is the only person who makes you feel small, her words and actions may not wield much power over you because other people make you feel seen and heard.

These people serve to reassure you when her actions induce self-doubt. This should come into your mind any time you have thoughts like  my wife belittles me

8. Expand Your Knowledge

What if your wife belittles you because she feels more intelligent, and hence her views matter more? Imagine a scenario where a wife does not involve her husband while making decisions that affect their marriage.

Or does not listen to him because he needs to be educated. In this case, she may love you but believe you should be silent on some issues because you are not informed enough to decide.

The internet is free. If you are less educated, try returning to school, getting subscribed to valuable newsletters, and learning something new daily will help you.

As time passes, she will see that you can make valuable input and would love to consider your views. This should come into your mind any time you have thoughts like  my wife belittles me.

9. Ditch Bad Habits

It is difficult for a wife to respect a husband who drinks and smokes excessively or indulges in other destructive habits. It is a tell-tale sign that you do not even value yourself.

How, then, can someone else hold you in high esteem? If you cannot keep your space clean, leaving your wife to pick up after you like a child, she may treat you as one.

Respect is reciprocal in marriages as well. How you treat yourself plays a significant role in how your woman will treat you. Anytime you think “my wife belittles me.” be ready to apply this.

10. Be Reliable

You create room for your wife to treat you with condescension when you do not do as you say.

After all, you make her doubt you; what is the guarantee that you will not abruptly change your mind after she involves you in her decision-making process?

Saying yes when you meant to say no makes you look like a child, not the man of the house as you may claim to be. This should come into your mind any time you have thoughts like  my wife belittles me.

11. Take Care Of Your Body

If your wife belittles you by making uncouth remarks about your body, you can correct that by working on yourself if it is in your power.

For instance, if she often refers to your beer belly, you can take that as a challenge to work on yourself. She will have to look for something else when you take that away.

Plus, changing your body improves your mental state and signals to your spouse that you value yourself and deserve more. Ultimately, it affects her interactions with you.

12. Set Goals Accomplish Them

It takes a highly abusive person to belittle someone who constantly puts out work to create the life they desire.

If you are setting goals for yourself and smashing those goals, it will be tough for your wife to treat you as unimportant because all evidence says otherwise. Besides, you will be too focused on the things that matter to you to the exclusion of snide remarks.

Plus, when your life is in order, it makes her behave well to keep you because she knows that other women outside would treat you better because of who you are. Again, who belittles someone who is a source of pride to them?

13. Get A Life Outside Her

If you find your wife’s actions abusive, one step to breaking free is to have this other life that she is not part of away from home.

This involves getting a hobby or joining a club. This allows you to do something you love and will make it easier to leave if it ever comes to that.Anytime you think “my wife belittles me.” be ready to apply this.

14. Check Your Thoughts

Feeling belittled could mean that you are overreacting in some cases. Before you conclude that your wife treats you like an inferior, examine yourself.

Check whether you are not being sensitive because of insecurity. What is a harmless comment can be amplified by your mind if you are insecure about it.

Also, check if you do not have an over-bloated ego and constantly need to be pandered to. If your pride is the issue, you could misconstrue normal behavior. Anytime you think “my wife belittles me.” be ready to use this method.

15. Invite A Mediator

You can do this by consulting a marriage therapist. Having a marriage therapist listen to both of your discussions can be the key to finding out if your wife is belittling you or if you are proud.

A therapist or an elder experienced in matters like this can provide an objective examination and help both of you find your way back to the light. Anytime you think “my wife belittles me.” be ready to apply this.

Conclusion

Often, because you love your wife, her words and actions can inflict severe injuries on your psyche. Constant belittling can make you feel worthless and unwanted. It should be dealt with before it breaks you and your marriage.

You should not ignore this behavior because its effects are long-lasting and often difficult to heal. The good news is that your wife can change, and like every other challenge in marriage, you can overcome it and enjoy a blissful marriage.

 

1 thought on “My Wife Belittles Me – 15 Things To Do Immediately”

  1. I read this article and the solution often is about the victim having to do things like this: “As time passes, she will see that you can make valuable input and would love to consider your views. This should come into your mind any time you have thoughts like my wife belittles me.” WRONG. When belittling occurs while trying to please the other, it is wrong. No one deserves to be belittled. Period. This article is rife with this kind of “advice”. Forcing your will upon another through this kind of intimidating behavior is just encouraging more of it. Belittling your mate is not acceptable behavior. It is dehumanizing and “on” the dehumanizer to stop and learn acceptable relationship behavior. RESPECT is the foundation of any relationship. More so than “chemistry” it creates a safe environment in which love and friendship can grow. Belittling erodes respect and if not corrected by the offender will result in the destruction and dissolution of the relationship regardless of what “positive” actions the victim will take to educate the offender. .

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