How To Survive Divorce After 30 Years Of Marriage

How to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage is a question that scares couples who have divorced or going through a divorce.

Being separated from someone you’ve been with as a spouse for 30 years or more can be a whole new experience. It can be likened to a child who gets to know something new about life and existence.

In most cases, people who just had a divorce after 30 years of marriage ask questions like, how do I start?, how do I move on?, where do I go from here?, what do I do now? All these questions can increase anxiety or may lead to depression.

Most people who try answering these questions without the proper guidelines end up frustrated and practically give up existing or try to figure out things with their new life.

How To Survive Divorce After 30 Years Of Marriage -11 Quick Steps

Truthfully sorting all this out alone isn’t easy or good for your mental health. That’s why we’ve laid out 11 steps to help you move on and how to survive your divorce after 30 years of marriage.

1. Support Groups

The first and advisable thing you should do after a divorce should be to look out for or find a support group that aligns with your present state.

Sometimes when people get a divorce, they get the feeling that they are all alone in that situation, or they are the only ones experiencing a divorce, or they are the first to have a divorce, making them sink into the oceans of self-pity and self-denial which leads to a depressive state.

Look out for a support group for divorced parents or partners. Meeting people with the same or almost the same experience eases or takes away anxiety.

It will help put comfort in knowing some people understand how you feel and are ready to encourage you through the journey of living again.

If there is none beside you or closer to you, you need to be your support system by encouraging yourself, getting up, and getting a life.
Just breathe and let it all out.

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2. Get A Therapist

Meet and register for therapy. Mental, physical, and social therapy.

This will aid you in releasing the questions and letting out every burden within or questions or words you can’t just let out.

Professions marriage counselors or therapists are skilled to help you figure out what you want or need to do to move on, on a healthy part.

Most times, most spouses or partners who have just experienced divorce go through a lot trying to figure out what their next step will be but end up making deer mistakes.

The proper guidance and help of a counselor or therapist make the whole load easier to carry.

3. Avoid Stalking Your Ex-partner

The easiest or fastest thing most people do after a divorce or separation for a longtime partner is the stalk them on every platform or place.

It is natural for you to be curious about what they might be doing or how they are waiting after the divorce.

Sometimes most people want to know if they are doing better than them, if they have been able to move on, or if they still think of them.

You have to avoid all this. Disconnect yourself from them for a while till you can live at least a day thinking about yourself and not them.

Stalking them doesn’t help out with your sanity. Rather, it worsens matters and increases your chances of going into depression.

4. Welcome The Feelings

Welcome the feelings. It is natural to feel the way you are feeling right now after separating from a person you’ve been married to for 30 years through a divorce.

In times like this, you will be urged to fight those feelings. Instead of digging off those feelings instead, welcome them for a moment.

After welcoming them for a moment, you can release them through several means: crying, shouting, exhaling, etc.

Welcoming your feelings or accepting how you feel means you are being true to yourself.

The state of your holding them in may lead to health and mental issues.

Sometimes you should accept how you truly feel because it helps you find a way out of it and also helps you figure out what the problem might be.

how to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage

5. Don’t Drown In Your Frustration

After figuring out how you feel. Don’t let yourself stay in that negative energy, because you have tried all mediums or the present, and new experience is taking a toll on you shouldn’t make you give up on moving on from your divorce.

Most men or women who get divorced after 30 years easily let themselves drown in their frustration if not knowing what to do next with their life.

Yes, 30 years is a long time, but truthfully that’s more than a decade. You don’t have to give yourself to the feeling that it’s late for you to live life anew. Get up and try again. You have a life ahead to live.

6. Avoid Regrets

Do well to avoid having regrets about everything. Regrets will never help to solve your current state of confusion or despair. Rather, it escalates your worries and fears.

Don’t go questioning yourself and or blaming yourself for the divorce. Instead of putting blames or questioning yourself, try sewing your strengths.

If the fault was from you, then work on being someone better, not sleeping on the wrong-doing.

Constant, if I had known, will never get you anywhere. Rather I will make things better.

7. Accept Reality

A divorce from a marriage of 30 years, especially when it’s not what you expected or wanted, but you had to give in to your partner’s request, may give you an awful feeling and put you in the state of wishing it never happened.

In this state, most people choose not to live in the reality of them being divorced. 

Making them live life as an imaginary one and keep them in a state of regret and wishing upon the stars.

It is important, no matter how hard it is, that you accept the reality of you having a new life that you need to make the best of it. This is how to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage

8. Focus On Making Your Dreams Come True

Get a life, and it is never too late to achieve that life-long dream you had before you went into a marriage that lasted 30 years but ended in a divorce.

Stand up from that place of regret, and wake up from that place of wishful thinking.

Work on your goals, and focus on things that make you happy. Go on journeys. Explore new things, meet new people, and do something your passion craves for. This improves how to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage

how to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage

9. Get A Healthy Routine

People who come out of marriages for 30 years end up having an unhealthy daily routine.

Because of the whole new experience, most of them end up getting bad habits like drinking, smoking and doing other things that are not good for their well-being.

Getting a healthy daily routine to listen to things that inspire these things will aid you in moving on from the divorce.

Alcohol does not remove the pain of separating from someone you’ve been married to for 30 years, or living unhealthy will not turn the hands of time.

Get yourself together for your good. Life is worth living, no matter the bad experiences. This is how to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage.

10. Set Boundaries For Your Communication

So as not to keep yourself in a place of pity or constant reminders. Setting boundaries in your communication will do magic.

Repeating certain words about your partner or marriage will not help. Rather, it takes you to mind down memory lane with them, bringing you to a place of regret and wishful thinking.

Limit or cut from talking about them till you can move on or talk about them without being sensitive.

If it has to do with you staying away from them for a while, it is advisable. Put yourself first, and then let the rest come along. Setting boundaries is how to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage

11. Agree On A Plan For Your Children’s Upkeep

If you have children who are not yet up to the age of being on their own but are still dependent on you and stay with you.

It would help if you talked with your partner about how you will care for them or who they will stay with.

Get an agreement or sign an agreement on how the children will be taken care of.

Consider the feeling of your children and how the situation might affect them. Try not to get them involved in the whole drama as much as possible. this is how to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage

Conclusion

After all, is said and done, you have to be willing to move on from the divorce after 30 years of marriage in case you are interested to know how to survive divorce after 30 years of marriage.

Everything starts mentally, and if you stay in the past, there’s no way these steps will change the present situation.

Give yourself a moment to put it in your subconscious that you want to move on; following these steps won’t be a hard deal for you.

 

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